I realize I just stopped writing about the accident in this blog (or I just stopped writing altogether, again) but I am still reliving that tragedy, mentally...and physically.
One of the positive consequences of the accident was I started taking care of my body more. And as my dad taught me, exercise for the body, is exercise for the mind.
The first step was to seek physical therapy before I tried to start working out again. Since I was struggling mentally and physically, I was referred to a practioner in Beverly Hills to have CST work done (cranial sacrial treatment), which helps with healing of the mindy and body. Not only were my legs and pelvis and head and neck being adjusted and realigned, so too was my mind, as the practitioner forced me to address the mental chaos that was causing physical discomfort. He was seaking to heal me mentally as well as physically.
I always knew there was a connection between the body and mind but I never was so in tune with how body reacted to my emotions. I finally understood what my therapist was asking all those times when she would say, "So how does your body feel?" And I would answer, "Um, my fist is clenched?" Duh, I didn't know. For example, stress usually causes a headache and neck and shoulder tension. Fear and anxiety can cause stomach discomfort and irritable bowel syndrome. Anger can cause my chest to feel strained. But there was so much more my body was doing after the accident. so that after a few adjustments, it was as if I was blessed with a miracle worker and I was practically healed in body and mind.
After just three sessions, my back and neck were feeling better and I was less emotional. Finally I was learning to cope with the accident.
Very soon after I was able to get back in the gym and started with yoga and pilates. Since I still did not have a car, I was forced to get a ride to the gym and spend more time there than I ever would have had I not been waiting for a ride. Trust me, it was far better than having to be at home, stuck with the Roommate. The gym was on the way home for one of my co-workers, and if I wanted to catch a ride with her, I had to leave work early. And that's when Brad was getting off of work really late, so, I found myself working out sometimes 2 to 3 hours. Stretching, Elliptical machine, pilates. Then my strength started returning and I began"spinning" before Pilates.
I would not say I was in the best physical shape, but it was nice to still be slim rather than immobilized and feeling sorry for myself. Believe it, or not, I actually miss having an excuse to spend so many hours at the gym. Having a car again means that I am happily back to kickboxing while still managing to do pilates once a week, but now, I go in for my class and leave the gym immediately after. Also, I come away from kickboxing hurting a bit in my back and knees, which is a reminder of the accident and that it left me vulnerable to further injuries in those areas if I am not careful and I overdo it.
And emotionally? I would say that I am stable. Kickboxing is great for getting out any aggression I feel on bad days. And speaking of, I could really use a kickboxing class now while sit furiously blogging because of the Roommate. I'll kickbox now in my mind. Target = The Roommate. Upper cut, jab, roundhouse. Again. Upper cut, jab, roundhouse....