Connection

What is a typical night in the life of this 30 something year-old woman who is married with 3 kids you ask? Well let me tell you...

Kids are down and in bed by 7pm and I sigh a HUGE sigh of relief and freedom. No more nagging "mommy, mommy, MOMMY" for the next several hours. I can do and say whatever I want. I can watch TV that does not consist of primary color characters dancing and singing in high pitched voices. I can eat my secret stash of cookies and dark chocolate. I can pour a cold one and sit in silence! Ahhh, it is pure bliss I tell you.

But then suddenly I hear the garage door open and the back door squeak open and slam shut...the husband is home. Sure maybe I should greet him adorned in my apron and flawless makeup and hair with a big smile and a loving "How was your day dear?" I should have a hot dinner laid with a glass of wine and the table set.....

We all know that there is no way in HELL that is going to happen. The reality is this: The entire downstairs floor is covered in toys, food crumbs, sometimes rocks and leaves from the yard. Every counter surface is strewn with dishes. There's no dinner except for the cold mac-n-cheese and fish sticks left over from the kids. A few half drunk cups of milk might go nice with that. You can find me sitting on the couch drinking my "mommy juice" watching Entertainment Tonight and tuning out ALL my responsibilities.

I muster up some strength to engage with the husband, but he is busy too and needs to jump on the computer to continue work. I think maybe I should make dinner. So I start working on it. I decide to flip the TV off and put some music on. Well that distracts him so he asks me to turn it off. Ummm, I don't think so I say, this is MY time! So what does husband do? He walks to the garage and comes back with his GIGANTIC, blue annoying ear covers that he uses when he does yard work. We continue in this fashion for awhile. Him on the computer working and tuning out the world, me cooking and cleaning rocking out to "Florence and the Machine" on the ipod. I eat. He works. I decide to get my laptop and play on the internet (he has taken over the desktop). He works more while his dinner sits and gets cold. I drink and play on the computer. We are literally 8 feet apart from one another both on our computers. Finally, I tire of this. I start thinking, which sometimes turns out to be dangerous, I wish I had my girlfriends here to hang out with. This being on separate computers and not communicating SUCKS. I want connect. The girls and EASY to be with, its so natural and comforting. We can talk for hours without taking a breath. We share our lives and it doesn't seem to take much effort to do so. Most nights I end up texting one or a few of them. We banter back and forth ending up with a few laughs. I always feel good after that, like there is someone out there that understands. I LOVE my girlfriends and sometimes wish I lived with them.

Although I have never read the book "Men are from Mars and women are from Venus," I tend to think that is true!!! We live on different planets and communicate in totally opposite ways! Getting back to my typical night: Husband finally decides to shut down the computer and wants to engage about the day. Unfortunately, it is a little too late I am tired, falling asleep and could care less about talking. I am tired of giving out all day and I just want to pass out on the couch. So that's what happens....I pass out on the couch into deep and restful sleep. In a few short hours the "mommy, mommy, MOMMY" begins again. Maybe the night will turn out different the next day? Maybe I will get dinner on the table for him? Maybe we will connect? Who knows, probably it will just be another typical night of a 32 year-old married woman with 3 kids...

-Signed

Annie